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01/09/2018 3:39 PM | Dr. Vicki High (Administrator)

My heart is heavy as I read the verbal attacks for and against Oprah and Ivanka. When did we become so judgmental on things we know nothing about? Once the abuse victim, our words lead us into the role of the abuser if we are not diligently seeking to heal from the abuse. As we forgive those who trespass against us, we try to understand the why and how as well as the impact on us personally. In my work, I find that abusers are often former victims. That doesn't make it right. That doesn't change the abuse, but it is part of the truth. 

Forgiveness and accountability are necessary to change the situations, but rants and spewing - that may be free speech, but can also become verbal abuse. 

Here are a few things to ponder: 

We want the truth, but can we handle the truth?

We demand change, but we have waited years to speak up. Then we judge others for not acting and speaking up on our behalf according to our time frame. Then we rant and accuse - what makes this right on any level???? 

We speak of honoring the truth. We support Oprah's speech while receiving the Cecil B. DeMille Award, because we hear the truth in her words, but we do not allow for Ivanka to speak her truth, especially if it supports the #TimesUp issues? 

I feel that's a case of too many people determining what the truth is... for me, for Oprah, for Invanka and the millions of other women and men who feel strongly about this issue. Think long and hard about the dirty, little secrets we keep because someone we love, someone we know, or some stranger in our world does something unthinkable to us or someone we know. 

Look inside - what makes people judge and jury over others when they haven't dealt with ugly family secrets or the ways they abuse themselves and others. What I've learned is you spot it - you've got it in some form or fashion. #youspotityougotit

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